Are You Fighting?

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Do you ever feel like your life is a struggle and that you are often fighting against temptation and negative thoughts? Does it seem like your life is a war and you are fighting in a battle? If so, the reason is that we are in a battle, and our enemy, Satan, will try everything he can to discourage us and hinder our fellowship with Jesus and our fellow brothers and sisters in Christ. So if you are fighting, keep fighting!

God has supplied everything we need for our battle in this life. Some friends and I were discussing Ephesians 6:10-18 about the armor of God recently. Each piece is a valuable part of our daily walk with Christ, and contributes to our success in our battle against sin and the world. It is important to remember that we are not fighting against other people, although sometimes it seems like we might want to. Our war is a spiritual war, and so we must use the armor and weapons God has given us if we want to be successful. At the end of verse 18, Paul encourages us to pray for each other, and this is one of our most valuable resources in our fight against the world.
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Hebrews 10:24,25 says: “And let us consider how to provoke one another to love and good deeds, not neglecting to meet together, as is the habit of some, but encouraging one another, and all the more as you see the Day approaching.” If you are fighting, do not try to fight alone! In our pride, we often try to hide our struggles from others so we can appear to have everything under control. However, God has given us fellowship with other believers to encourage and strengthen us when we need help. He created us to help each other and pray for each other. So if you feel like you are alone in your battle, look at who God has placed in your life to help you fight. We can also remember that part of our responsibility is to fellowship and encourage others. Recently I have been very thankful for my family and Christian brothers and sisters that are in my life, and have encouraged me to keep fighting. Do not fight alone!

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October 11th is my wedding anniversary! Marriage has been good, but not quite what I expected when I said “I do” five years ago. Here are five ways that God has been teaching me to live out His reality in my marriage…

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1)    Trust God with the things that are most important to me.

Luke’s first “competition” turned out to be VOICE. We made a decision early on to transfer the leadership from me to him, but that also meant me letting him do things differently than I would. That was rough. In the process, however, God taught me to make marriage my first ministry and trust Him to work through other people in other ways at VOICE.

 2)    We need community.

Before I had Arianna, I had a miscarriage. I chose not to talk about it, thinking that would make it easier. It didn’t. Over the course of that year, I learned that Luke and I need the body of Christ to challenge our perspective, to encourage us when we’re sad, and to point us to Christ in our struggles.

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3)    We can’t save each other.

You may have heard Luke and I talk about our battle against pornography. I once believed that if I was a good wife, Luke wouldn’t be tempted in this way. I was wrong. Even when I bent over backwards to bless him, it wasn’t enough. One night after a hard talk, I remember thinking, “There’s nothing I can do to save him!” And that was when God replied, “That’s right…but he has a Savior who can.” That was a pivotal moment for me—and the first time I realized how amazing it is to have a God like that.

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4)    I can’t forgive unless I understand I’ve been forgiven.

I never thought I had a problem with anger, but over the last few years, I’ve struggled a lot with bitterness. Whenever I felt wronged, I’d find myself in a cycle of hurt, anger, and self-justification. The only way I was able to climb out of that cycle was when God opened my eyes to the price He paid to forgive me. Only when I understand my debt to Christ can I find grace to forgive others.

5)    Marriage gets better with time!

Before I got married, a well-meaning friend warned me that marriage would be hard. He was right. The good news, however, is that God also designed marriage to be good. Even though courtship was fun and exciting, God has used the joys and struggles in marriage to deepen our love for each other and for Him.

130814 lkK-01 height=”213″ />And on that note, I’d like to say, “Happy anniversary, Darling. I love you more today than all of our yesterdays.”

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Wedding photos by Katherine Fan  |  Glacier National Park photo by Noel Kallberg

Decisions, Decisions

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I’ve always hated decisions. Mostly because I know that by choosing one thing, I’m automatically saying no to all the other choices in front of me. It doesn’t matter whether I’m choosing between outfits, food, or what color to paint my walls, I hate the pressure and responsibility of decisions. I’m always plagued with the thought of “But what if I choose the WRONG thing and end up tragically unhappy for the rest of my life all because of one bad choice?” I’m being dramatic, but you get the point. I hate making decisions. decision-1

Because I fear the consequences of choosing incorrectly, I tend to shy away from commitments and decision making of all kinds. When it comes to finding “God’s will” for my life, I often feel completely overwhelmed and burdened with having to choose what to do. 

A couple weeks ago, I faced a big decision as I was trying to decide whether to stay in America or go back to Taiwan for the year. While both were great options, the more I thought through them, prayed, and received counsel from my parents and friends, the more indecisive I became. Which one was God’s will for my life and how was I supposed to know when it seemed like either could be God’s will?

Eventually, I made the decision to come back to Taiwan. Why? As scandalous as it sounds, I came back because I wanted to come back and because I think God put that desire there for a reason. Surprisingly enough, what led me to that freedom was actually a clearer picture of how Christ, through the gospel, has already secured all of my satisfaction and success through His life and death; I could throw off my fear of failure or fear of making the wrong decision because everything that I needed or could ever want was already found completely in Christ. I was free to do what I wanted without looking for satisfaction from my choices. I was free…simply because Christ had made me free.    

“It is for freedom that Christ has set us free…” [Galatians 5:1]

This concept of freedom is still a lot for me to wrap my mind around, especially after living so long burdened in my indecisiveness. But I’m coming to find that freedom really does change everything. I don’t have to fear the consequences of making the wrong choice because in Christ it really doesn’t matter what decisions I make, if I’m walking in His ways, I’m free to choose what I want. I’m free to step out. I’m free to change my mind. I’m free from my own expectations and the expectations of those around me. Free. Simply because Christ has set me free.

A Practical Sign of Faith

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130823 PrayerYears ago, I read a poem about a person who was very burdened with stress and a full schedule and put off praying that day saying, “I’m so busy that I can’t take time to pray”. Things don’t go well for this person as they bumble through the day in their own strength. The poem ends with the person waking up the next day – to another full schedule – and saying, “I’m so busy today that I HAVE to take time to pray.”

This is where I often find myself  – easily putting off prayer. Sometimes it’s because I feel my schedule is too full and other “urgent” things have priority – like my three year old daughter who clearly got the “very early morning person” gene. 🙂 Sometimes it’s because there is much weighing on my mind and I feel that I need to think it through before I know how to present it to God (who knows all about it anyway – doesn’t make a lot of sense, does it?). Whatever the reason I find to neglect praying, it’s not nearly as urgent or important as all the reasons I should be praying.

When I really think about it, consistent prayer is probably one of the clearest and most practical signs that I truly believe that God is real. I can think of a few people that I know who clearly have well developed prayer lives –it’s just part of their thought process! When talking to these people even briefly, they’ll often say “let me pray for you” or “let’s talk to God about this” and it’s not awkward or showy – it’s as normal as if they stopped to include another person in the conversation. God is real to them! They often have stories to share of what God is doing around them and they inspire me (and others) to follow harder after Him.

I want to be like that – to have prayer such a part of my daily life that Jesus is literally the friend always beside me ready for conversation. When prayer is built into my life, I will not only receive the benefits of exercising my faith and having good communication with God, but those who come into contact with me may very well see more of Him, too.

what Cathedrals and Youth Rooms teach us about God

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This year I’ve had the chance to see some really old and grand cathedrals in Europe. Everything about it is really incredible – the detailed carvings, stained glass mosaics, high ceilings that are tens of stories above you.

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You walk in and immediately sense the atmosphere of reverence. Either you stay silent or whisper because the sacred and solemn surroundings command respect. (And also because any sound you make would be amplified in the large hall.)

The youth room at my church is quite a contrast to these magnificent cathedrals. We have low ceilings, IKEA couches, a lamp, over-sized pillows, and a couple stuffed animals in the mix. It’s cozy and like a living room, probably similar some rooms of your own church.

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Two very different places, both places of worship. The cathedral well represents the transcendence of God – He is far above and unlike us, and so purely holy that it should evoke reverence and awe in us. Sitting on a pew in a huge antique church reminds me of how God is high and lifted up, infinitely greater than me, and inspires the fear of the Lord and worship of His greatness.

The youth room reflects the immanence of God – He is a personal God who stoops down from heavenly majesty to earth to become human and to identify with us. He is present in our daily lives and acquainted with all our ways. Sitting on a couch in our youth room reminds me that God is entirely relevant and real today, not distant and impersonal. It inspires a response of relationship and trust.

The church is a place of worship and reverence. The church is a place of family and community. God is infinitely high. God is incredibly near. Praise and worship Him!

Confessions of an Insecure Perfectionist

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Confessions of an Insecure Perfectionist

Insecurity is one of my besetting sins. It’s one of those core-issue, mindset kind of sins that affects everything I think and do. It has been a part of my life for so long that I don’t even have to think about it, my mind just automatically runs all of it’s decisions through the Insecurity Evaluation Filter to determine the amount of risk to my ego. Let’s just say… it’s a stressful way to live.

I can finally talk about insecurity honestly because its hold on my soul is cracking.

While I was growing up, I envied, despised, and totally did not understand all those confident kids. I both hated them and wished that I could be like them. I strove for perfection in everything that I did, somehow planning that once I was perfect I too would be confident. As an insecure perfectionist, I was plagued with awareness of all the areas in which I did not measure up, and thus all the more insecure as I had to hide my shortcomings from the world.

I have come to realize that perfection isn’t the secret to confidence, truth is. When I agree with God that I am in need of grace and forgiveness, insecurity loses its power because I have nothing left to hide. When I agree with God that I am justified and adopted as a joint heir with Christ, confidence finds root-not in my perfection-but in God’s declaration of my righteousness. I no longer have to live life in painful insecurity of my shortcomings and sin, not because I have never sinned, but because I am confident that Christ has made me clean.

A Giants Perspective

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I recently was visiting a friend before her wedding and I couldn’t help but smile as I saw this big red board that she and friends have been writing on for the past year. They have made it a daily habit writing something that they are thankful for on the board. Each time the board is full, they erase and start all over with more words of thanks!

I loved the concept, and since I’m a very visual person it clearly displayed the scripture found in 1 Thessalonians 5:16-18: “Rejoice always. Pray without ceasing. Give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you.”

God’s will is that we have an upward perspective. One that is continually in a spirit of thankfulness. It’s extremely hard to be discouraged about things not going the way you planned when you are remembering all the times that God has been faithful, protected you from danger, provided for a need, or sent someone to cross your path and encourage you just when you needed it most.

The act of gratitude begins with perspective, and with you. You have to decide whether to be the grasshopper surrounded by big-eyed giants, or be the giants admiring the grasshoppers. It’s about remembering the little things that give meaning to life.

God gave you a gift of 86,400 seconds today. Can you take one moment and tell the world one thing that YOU are grateful for?

I’ve already started the list below – Go ahead and add to it as things come to mind!

Illusory Coincidences

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I have a friend that I have been mentoring for the last year and a half who has struggled with drug addiction for many years. He has moved around a few times to help him steer clear of former drug dealers and various influences from his past, all while he’s worked hard to try to rebuild his life. It’s been awesome to see him respond to God’s grace over the last few months, but an interesting situation occurred last month that has really tested him. After he made a purchase at an electronics store, he went to his home and waited for the product to be delivered. Showing up at his doorstep with the product he had purchased was a former drug dealer who was also working for the electronics company. This drug dealer not only began to try making some re-connections, but he also now had access to all of my friend’s personal information (through the computers at the electronics store). So tell me, are situations like this merely coincidence, is God just out to test us, or is there something more sinister going on behind the scenes?

We talk a lot at VOICE about how real our God is, but do you live your life with the awareness that you have a very real enemy as well? Satan wants to snuff out your life! If he can’t do that, then he wants to work his hardest to ensure that you are not able to walk truly in the Light of Gospel. Situations like my friend encountered are a stark reminder to me that there is no such thing as coincidence. Are you going to tell me that in a town of 100,000 people the one person you don’t want on your doorstep “just happens” to show up?

One note of caution: I’ll be the first to tell you that just because temptations and trials come, I don’t believe that indicates that there is a demon hiding behind every tree (Luke has some good thoughts on this very topic). Not only is that mentality nowhere in Scripture, but I also know the state of my own heart and what I naturally gravitate towards.

However, here’s the challenge: as we know, just believing that God is real does not really get you too far. The demons believe, and they’re even freaked out by the knowledge (James 2:19). If your eyes have been opened to the truth of the Gospel, you’re going to try to live it out. The same point exists regarding our enemy. Do you believe that Satan is real? That’s nice…so, what are you doing about it?

“Be well balanced (temperate, sober of mind), be vigilant and cautious at all times; for that enemy of yours, the devil, roams around like a lion roaring [in fierce hunger], seeking someone to seize upon and devour.” (1 Peter 5:8 AMP)

Satan is real. Live like it.

Why?

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Damage from a tornado in Moore, Oklahoma last month.

Why do bad things happen to good people? Why do bad things happen to anybody? If God is good, why does He allow bad things in this world – sometimes terrible things?
Last month we had several very powerful tornadoes in our area. One of them came within one mile of our house. Thousands of houses were destroyed, billions of dollars of damage, hundreds of people injured, and more than fifty people killed. I attended the funeral of one of the victims whose father I knew. Hundreds of people were there…and amazingly, it was a hopeful, encouraging time. Everyone was supporting each other, seeking God together, reminding each other that God goes with us through our pain. God suffers when we suffer. And God brings good out of our suffering and His suffering.

I don’t know why God let the tornadoes happen – probably there are many reasons. Probably there are special reasons in the lives of each person who was affected. Some of God’s reasons might be difficult to accept if we knew them. But maybe it wouldn’t be so difficult if we saw how everything fits together.

The week after one of the storms, I was listening to a sermon on Sunday morning and noticed what Joseph said to his brothers in Genesis 50:
“As for you, you meant evil against me, but God meant it for good…” (Gen. 50:20).

You know the story of Joseph, right? His brothers sold him as a slave into Egypt, where he was falsely accused of assault and imprisoned for three years. Because of that, he met the king’s wine taster. Because of that, he met the king and saved Egypt from a famine. Because of that, his own family moved to Egypt. Because of that, the family grew into a large nation: Israel. Because of that, the Egyptians hated them and they left Egypt and wandered in the wilderness for forty years. Because of their experiences in the wilderness and the Law that God gave them, they learned to trust God instead of themselves. Because of this, Israel was set on a path that would prepare them and even us to trust Jesus Christ. The evil done to Joseph was an integral part of the picture of God’s redemption of the world.

And this all began because Joseph’s brothers intended evil against him. Who fully understands God’s power to bring good out of evil? Certainly not me. But I think we can see glimpses of it at times, and those glimpses can help us to believe in bigger pictures like this one. This is part of living out God’s reality…in the middle of the reality around us. VOICE 2013 starts in less than a month and we’ll be talking about all kinds of stuff like this with more students and staff. See you there!

Have You Forgotten the Truth?

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lies-truthI recently read a book called Eyes Wide Open written by the Christian novelist, Ted Dekker.In this book, the two main characters – Austin and Christy – find themselves in a world where they’re struggling to find out the truth of who they really are despite the lies of what people are telling them. The longer they listen to the lies, the more the characters begin to believe that the lies actually are their reality. It’s only when they see their world through a mysterious pair of glasses, that their eyes are finally opened to see beyond the deception and into the light of truth. Finally, everything in their lives make sense. However, these glasses are quickly torn from their eyes and they’re again forced back into their old reality. The challenge that they then face is remembering the truth in a world that seeks to deceive them. One line that jumped off of the page at me was this:

“Life is a cycle of remembering and forgetting.” 

Maybe it’s an overly simplistic concept, but think about it: we’re prone to forget the truth, only to be reminded again, only to forget again. This is the cycle and struggle that, towards the end of the book, Ted Dekker does a fantastic job of portraying.

I wish I could say that I don’t understand this cycle of forgetting. But actually, I do. Because this story isn’t just about Christy and Austin…it’s also about me.

This past year, I did a lot of forgetting. Even though I’ve known and experienced the truth of God’s faithfulness in my life, I went through times in the past year where God felt distant and far removed from my circumstances. From where I was standing, life didn’t make sense. I wanted God to prove Himself and silence my doubt like He’d done for His people all throughout the pages of scripture. But He didn’t. Or at least not in the way I was hoping for. I started to believe the lies that God was distant to my pain, elusive, and silent to all of my questions.

However, when I needed it most, God brought people into my life who reminded me of truths that I’d known in the past, but had forgotten when the skies of doubt had clouded my horizon. It was the remembrance of God’s faithfulness, promises, and love that eventually gave me the eyes to see the truth that God’s goodness and ways don’t always fit into my way of understanding the world. And that’s okay. Because He’s God and I’m not.

I think we all have gone through or will go through periods where we wonder what in the world God is doing. We may question God’s plans and start to believe the lie that He’s not truly good if He allows pain and trials in our lives. However, we have to remind ourselves that no matter what our circumstances or emotions tell us, God never fails or makes mistakes. When we choose to open our eyes wide to the reality of truth, every lie of unbelief will come crumbling down.