Tag Archives: gratefulness

Brotherly Love in Bible Lab

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“Behold, how good and how pleasant it is for brethren to dwell together in unity!” (Psalm 133:1)

In recent years, one of the greatest things that I am thankful for is being a part of Bible Lab. What is Bible Lab, you might ask? Bible Lab was started by my sister Karen originally as a time for her and another VOICE student to study the Bible together in English, and they came up with the term “Bible Lab”. I decided I would start doing the same thing, and so I and another VOICE student (who just happened to also be the younger brother of the first VOICE student) began to meet as well. Though at first I wanted a different name for the boy’s Bible study, the name Bible Lab name stuck.

Over the years, the people who make up Bible Lab have changed a lot. At times, the change can be sudden and difficult to adjust to. I remember back in 2011, when many students from that year’s VOICE joined Bible Lab, and suddenly, Bible Lab felt very different. At first, it was tempting to look back and wish that things could remain the way that they once were, to look down on the new students as immature strangers intruding in our close-knit group. At that moment, us older Bible Lab members had a choice: would we love and accept these new people as a part of us?

I am so thankful that together, we chose to love, and through that choice, God’s love became more real to me, and to all the people who attend Bible Lab. Because of that conscious choice, we have set a pattern where we continue to choose to accept anyone who comes to join, no matter what their age is, even if they haven’t been to VOICE. Currently, the people who come regularly to Bible Lab come from a variety of different years of VOICE— and even some who haven’t ever gone. We come from different churches, we are all different ages. What unites us is our love for God, our love for each other, and our desire to grow closer to Him.

While Bible Lab may only be in Taipei, remember, the body of Christ is all around the world. Don’t worry if you start small, because God’s love is contagious. Make the conscious choice to open your heart to others, and see how God’s love transforms your life and the lives of those around you.

Oh, and if you’re in Taipei? Let us know. You’re welcome to come to Bible Lab!

Bible Lab Thanksgiving 2014

Out of the Mire

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Sorry it’s so long, but it’s honest.

January of 2014, I was so excited to be back serving at a ministry. No more long days of staring at my computer screen working on projects I cared little or nothing about, and had seemingly no eternal value!

I poured myself into the students around me. My official work hours were Monday-Friday, 8-5pm, but actually, I was there from 8am-8pm, or 9pm… or 10pm.

“Are you sure you’re taking enough time off and getting enough rest? You could go to the dorm and get some time to yourself.” – I remember Mr. Matt asking me that so many times, and each time I replied “Why would I want to go home? I’m happy to be here, and being alone would be boring.”

Days turned into weeks, weeks turned into months, and by September my brain finally caught up with my body long enough to shout into it’s stubborn ear “STOP IT! I’m TIRED.” – I had hit a wall. I didn’t want to be “on” all the time.

I wanted quiet. I wanted an off switch. I found a needed haven in three good friends who were also physically and emotionally spent. We relaxed together, shared together, prayed & fellowshipped together… we bonded, and they became some of my dearest friends. (In fact, this past June I married one of them! ^_^) The time we spent was a blessing. I had found an oasis in the dessert, and God used it to bless the rest of my life!

BUT… as 2015 began, my job changed drastically. I was no longer teaching in the classroom, I was working in the office. I was excited to finally work on my many projects uninterrupted! – My hours also changed in a good way that helped me to stop on time.

Unfortunately, it also meant that I wouldn’t be joining a family group in the morning, but I thought it would be okay. [I didn’t need the accountability of a family group to make sure I did my morning devotions, right?] Well, maybe if I had been spiritually healthy at the beginning, that would have been true — but I wasn’t, so it wasn’t.
My quiet times got shorter, and fewer, and more haphazard.

Moreover, I began to avoid human interaction. I didn’t want to be constantly surrounded by people, or be responsible for what was taking place, or be involved in the game over at that table, or go to the movies with that group, or go out of my way to build relationships …I was purposely backing myself into a job that entailed [long days of staring at my computer screen working on projects] again!
What was wrong with me? I had always cared about people!

I’d like to say that when I realized what was happening, I prayed and got right back on track! But… that would be a lie. I have prayed, but I’m still in the mire. Mostly by choice. Simple choices like hitting the snooze button “just one more time”, and working on my projects “just 5 minutes longer”.

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The most amazing part of all of this, is that I have never once felt that God has left me – that He has behaved toward me as I have toward Him. While I have ignored Him; choose sleep, work, and just about everything else over a conversation with Him, He has never failed me yet.

I find it so unimaginable — because, if I were Jesus, I would have cut me off months ago — then again, I keenly sense that this is the very grace I have long known and am merely tasting again, afresh. He is continuing to give me what I do not deserve. Himself.

By His hand, I see a light at the end of this tunnel… not because He’s going to make me climb out of this mess I’ve made for myself by myself (which is what I would probably do if I had such an ungrateful servant!), but by simply reaching up to grasp the hand He has continually had extended toward me all along. – By spending time WITH HIM.

He is so faithful. So kind. We serve a Good Master.

“1 I waited patiently for the LORD; he inclined to me and heard my cry. 2 He drew me up from the pit of destruction, out of the miry bog, and set my feet upon a rock, making my steps secure. 3 He put a new song in my mouth, a song of praise to our God. Many will see and fear, and put their trust in the LORD.

11 As for you, O LORD, you will not restrain your mercy from me; your steadfast love and your faithfulness will ever preserve me! 12 For evils have encompassed me beyond number; my iniquities have overtaken me, and I cannot see; they are more than the hairs of my head; my heart fails me.

17 As for me, I am poor and needy, but the Lord takes thought for me. You are my help and my deliverer; do not delay, O my God!”

– Psalm 40

of baby moons and the Gospel

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one monthElliot recently turned one month old. That means my Chinese baby moon is over.

In American culture, baby moon usually refers to taking a vacation before the baby arrives. In Chinese culture, however, it means dedicating a month after the baby’s arrival to rest, recover, and focus on caring for the newborn.

Mom & kidsI’ve had the privilege of having Mom help me with three baby moons. The first time was a bit of an adjustment as I learned the do’s and don’ts of Chinese baby moons—do stay in bed, do stay at home, don’t expose yourself or your baby to cold drafts, don’t eat cold food, don’t let your hair air dry (or even wash your hair if you can stand it)… The list is endless, and I confess I do some of it but not others. The part I love is that Mom does all the grocery shopping, all the cooking, all the dishes, and all the laundry. She also cleans up after my kids, burps my baby so I can eat in peace, and gets up early to keep my toddlers out of trouble so that I can sleep in—a luxury I desperately need when I’m getting up several times a night. There’s nothing like being mothered again once you’ve become a mother yourself, and I’m very grateful to both of my parents for loving us in this way.

But I must confess there’s an aspect that’s hard for me too. I have a little voice inside that says I should be taking care of my own family. I should be paying for the groceries. I should be helping my mother and not leaving all the work to her. But the reality is, I can’t. I’ve been too exhausted to keep up with my kids much less maintain the house. And our graduate school budget covers only a fraction of what my parents have spent on us this month. Deep down, I feel like I don’t deserve this at all, because I know I can never repay my parents for all the ways they have showered us with love—this month and my entire life.

In the same way, as I’ve been growing in my understanding of the Gospel, I’m beginning to see that Christianity is not about how I live my life but about how Christ lived His for me. He did the work I could not do. He died the death that I deserve. He did all of this not just because I am His daughter, but to make me His daughter. That’s a love I can never repay but is worthy of gratitude for the rest of my life.

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“But to all who did receive Him, who believed in His name, He gave the right to become children of God, who were born, not of blood nor of the will of the flesh nor of the will of man, but of God.” (John 1:12-13 ESV)

Safe.

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Safety…

I had never really considered it before.

Even when I lived alone, half-a-world away from family, I’ve been blessed with a sense of security & protection all of my life. With safety a seemingly natural thing, I never really considered what it would be like to feel UN-safe, UN-secure, UN-assured. UN-protected.

Then I began a relationship… with someone who made me feel completely safe. Even safer than ever before! So I still didn’t notice it.

As I began preparing for our wedding, I ran across a few blogs, snippets of books, etc that talked about marriage and relationships. They talked about how to overcome common threats to deepening relationships: Anxiety. Insecurities. Inadequacy. Fears.

Suddenly, I began to realize what a precious gift I did have, by understanding what I didn’t have. I was so grateful to my parents, grateful to my fiancé, grateful to God! Moreover, I’ve begun to feel the beautiful weight of how our relationship with our earthly spouse is a mirror of our identity in Christ. (Yeah, yeah, yeah. I’d heard that all my life… but I didn’t KNOW it.)

For those who are 2nd or 3rd generation Christians, we take Salvation through Christ for granted. It’s hard to imagine life without Him. We obviously don’t want to turn back time and live a more sin-filled life in order to drink more deeply of His grace, but… we don’t know what it means to return to our first love, because we scarcely remember that far back! (Except maybe what our favorite toy was!)

And yet… it’s HUGE! It’s such a HUGE THING to be Saved. Washed clean. Redeemed. Uncondemned. Pursued. Loved. Secure. Accepted. Adopted. Wanted. Cherished. Completely whole in Christ. Made new. Safe.

The prayer of an unbeliever.

The prayer of a not-yet-believer.

another face of humility

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imageThere’s a lot to be learned about humility. Right when I think that maybe I’m starting to get it…BAM. Pride smacks me in the face. Am I the only one who feels like trying to understand humility is like grasping for the wind?

But God has been teaching me humility in rather surprising ways. He’s been showing me that one face of humility is opening wide your hands and accepting with gratitude whatever God chooses to give. Not just the good things, but the hard, painful and disappointing things too.

Without going into all the ups and downs of life’s circumstances this year, I’ll just say this: I haven’t liked all of the things God has chosen to give me. I’ve thrown up a few fists and shouted “Why, God?” because deep down I’ve bought into the idea that I deserve better. I deserve to succeed, to live life pain-free, to be happy. I become the center and it’s here, here that ingratitude and pride squelches out joy.

Wasn’t ingratitude the problem from the beginning, from the Garden of Eden? Adam and Eve had everything and yet they let themselves believe that it wasn’t enough. They thought that they deserved better, and because they chose ingratitude, they were banished from the garden and broken off from communion with their Source of eternal joy and happiness.

Ingratitude. Pride. Fists in the air. “I deserve better.” This has been our story ever since that fateful day in the garden.

Thousands of years later, a better and more perfect Adam came, and it was He (Jesus) who lived the perfect life of gratitude to His Father, gave thanks over the Last Supper, and accepted the path of suffering that His Father had willed Him to endure. If anyone deserved better, it was Jesus. He wept, grieved, and He even asked “Why?” but then we see Him doing what Adam, Eve, and everyone since have failed to do. He completely trusted His Father’s love for Him and accepted the cup that was before Him, even though it meant losing His very life. He opened wide His hands to receive and because He did, we can now live and be restored to the only source that will bring us true joy.

Humility is opening our hands and accepting with thanksgiving whatever God chooses to give. Pride clutches it’s fist at troubles and let downs and says “I deserve better!” but humility sees everything – the good, the bad, and the painful – as given from an infinitely good and loving Father, Who loves better and more fully than we could ever imagine, and who uses even our troubles to prepare us “for an eternal weight of glory beyond all comparison.” [2 Corinthians 4:7]

“…finding out the greatness…”

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– 2013 –

“Lord, why am I here? You clearly opened the door for me to work at this job, but I feel like I’m dying inside! I don’t care about business; I don’t even believe in the work that I’m doing!”

A year and a half ago, my heart cried this regularly. I didn’t understand what the point was for me to be working at that company. I sought to share Christ my coworkers, but other than that? Ick. – I saw no purpose in my work.

Finally, I began to rest and trust God. I began to rejoice, even though I didn’t feel like it.

– 2014 –

Just this morning, long-anticipated plans threatened to collapse. Excitement turned to worry and frustration. Someone else’s money could be lost, myself and others would be sad and disappointed… I prayed frantically as I tried to fix things. I groaned. I wanted to cry.

Just as I began giving into my fear and sorrow, an old hymn came to mind. “Jesus, I am resting, resting in the joy of what Thou art. I am finding out the greatness of Thy loving heart.” I knew the words were not true of me, but they needed to be! Because God’s faithfulness was already true of Him. I began to sing.
– – –

Fast forwarding to my current self… >>>>

Now, I see so much more clearly! To my surprise, the skills that I use every day at my current job [which I love] are the very same ones that I learned at the job I felt unfulfilled by. – – – God knew the future. He knew my need. He knew what purpose He wanted to fit me for, and provided me with free (in fact, paid!) training for the work He was leading me to. – “This is the Lord’s doing, and it is marvelous in [my] eyes.”

And as for Today? 3.5 hours after it began, the crisis was over. The problem was solved. I’m still feeling an adrenaline rush from the “excitement”, but more than that, I’m so grateful to God for working it all out AND for teaching me again that rejoicing is always appropriate. That His name is worthy to be praised with or without the sun shining; with or without a silver lining.
– – –

These two circumstances remind of a lesson I learned 4 years ago… in the middle of yet another trial,

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“I will be praising God in a week or a year’s time for what is happening now, so why should I wait to praise and thank Him for His loving-kindness? He is ALWAYS good!”

Look at me!

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Boy riding a hippo “Look at me! Look at me! Uncle, look!” My nephew latches onto my finger, and tugs at me to join him. I can’t help but set aside whatever I’m doing to appreciate his newest discovery: a paper kite, a new acrobatic move, his little sister’s amusing antics, a laundry hamper transformed into a fort, a new monster formed out of Mr. Potato head parts…  even the most commonplace things are magical. Being only three years old, everything is new and exciting to my nephew. However, my nephew can’t completely enjoy his discoveries unless he shares it with a friend or family member. And if you are the one he is sharing with, you can’t help but be charmed by his sense of joy and wonder. Though it’s true his obsession with sharing everything with everyone seems a little extreme, at the same time, I realized that all humans, to some degree, are like my nephew. God created humans in his image, and God is a relational God. He has a relationship with Himself within the Trinity, and with us as His children. We are the same way, and an important part of enjoyment and pleasure is being able to share something that you enjoy with someone that you love, and the one you love in turn gets to experience something with you. So that means, if we truly love God, then when something brings us joy and delight, we should naturally also want to share it with God. When you are entertained by a movie, you should tell God about, and see how he feels about it. “Hey God, wasn’t that movie really cool? The script was written so well!” When you complete a difficult task, you can show it off to God. “Hey God, look at this musical that I finished!” One of the most special times that I had with God this past year was during a typhoon in the spring. I love running in the rain, and the sheets of rain crashing from the sky were both wild and refreshing. As I splashed through inch deep puddles around the track, I basked in the power of the storm, and in the presence of the Lord. The coolest thing about it? I think God enjoyed that time, too. Today, why don’t you pick something that you love, and take the time to enjoy it with God together? “Hey, God, look at me! God, look!”

Blessing and Glory

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Friend: “How can I bless you?”
Me: “…(long pause)…..What?”

I couldn’t respond, because I had never been asked that before. I had to think about it.

“How can I bless you?” – It seemed like a strange question… at first. But the more I thought about it, the more I realized that it is a very good question. It seeks to find out how to love others, which is what Christ has called us to do!
Thoughtfulness
At SYME, we talk about the 5 Love Languages.
We encourage our students to look around and INTENTIONALLY show love to others in the way they best receive it. (Which is often different than the way they give it.)

It’s not a question that we are always able to ask directly. In fact, sometimes asking the question can make the act less meaningful!(Because part of showing love is taking the time to discover the answer yourself.)

I want to become better at loving.
We each have 1 or 2 primary love-languages, so my teammate encouraged us to develop our weaker points:

  • Words of Affirmation – Ask God to change your thoughts! Make it a habit to think, write down, or say thankful/encouraging things about those around you.
  • Gift Giving – Thoughtless gifts don’t count. You need to spend time finding out what the person likes that you’re blessing.
  • Physical Touch – Obviously appropriateness of things like high-fives, hugs and back massages will greatly vary due to timing, gender, etc., but start with your family and branch out!
  • Quality Time – Put down your phone/computer, switch off the TV, stash your to-do list, and show someone you value them by giving them quality attention.
  • Acts of Service – Just do it! And even if you’re unqualified to assist in the task someone is working on, ask how you can pray for them, then follow through.

I want to intentionally be a blessing every day.
~~~~~~~~~~

So where does the “glory” come in?
I was struck by a challenge another teammate gave our students last week:

For at least one day, to ask Jesus about everything… EVERYTHING. Whatever you’re doing, thinking, struggling with, excited about — just ask Him what He wants, what He prefers, what His will is for you in that situation; because He has purchased your life. You are His, and you are meant to live this life for Him by His living in and through you!

This takes childlike faith and open communication.
I confess, I haven’t successfully done it for a whole day yet, but the times that I have, I noticed that my thoughts were more directed toward God, my heart was singing His praises, and I was also able to love others better… I was reminded why I live; why I EXIST!

– To glorify God and enjoy Him forever.

Pearl of Great Price

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“Again, the kingdom of heaven is like a merchant in search of fine pearls, who, on finding one pearl of great value, went and sold all that he had and bought it.” (Mt. 13:45-46)

pearlsThe interpretation of this parable of Jesus that I have always heard is that God, or Jesus Christ, is the Pearl of Great Price, and we are like the Merchant. We need to follow Jesus’ call to “Sell all that you have…come and follow me.” (Mt. 19:21) Several old hymns reinforce this idea, such as a beautiful translation of J.S. Bach’s “Jesu Meine Freude.” And there is something to be said for this idea: clearly Christ is valuable, the most valuable thing in the world and out of the world – “So therefore, any one of you who does not renounce all that he has cannot be my disciple.” (Lk. 14:33)

But there are problems with this interpretation – if we are the merchant, this makes it sound like we are searching for God until we find Him, then getting Him because we give something as payment. But, “no one understands; no one seeks for God.” (Rom. 3:11) And of course, “For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith–and this is not from yourselves, it is the gift of God.” (Eph. 2:8)

I’ve become fascinated by the possibility that this parable is actually talking about the way that God pursues us: He’s the merchant and we are the pearl. There is good Biblical support for this idea too. The old hymnwriter Charles Wesely wrote about the great price Christ paid: He “Emptied himself of all but love.” We are told, “…Christ Jesus, who, though he was in the form of God, did not count equality with God a thing to be grasped, but made himself nothing, taking the form of a servant, being born in the likeness of men. And being found in human form, he humbled himself by becoming obedient to the point of death, even death on a cross.” (Phil. 2:5-8) The image of God as a merchant who values me so much as to give up all He has to gain me…that moves me, changes my heart.

Whatever the correct interpretation is of this parable, the point about God pursuing us is true. “…the Son of Man came to seek and to save the lost.” (Lk. 19:10) This also changes my perspective on passages like Eph. 5: 25-27: “…Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, so that he might present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing.” I think that your life as a Christian is defined by God pursuing you, not by you pursuing God; by God valuing you rather than you valuing God; and by God the Son gaining us as a Bride more so than us gaining Him as a savior.

Relish this, revel in it, let it soothe, heal and transform you into the person whom God will enjoy for eternity. “We love because he first loved us.” (1 Jn. 4:19)

A Giants Perspective

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I recently was visiting a friend before her wedding and I couldn’t help but smile as I saw this big red board that she and friends have been writing on for the past year. They have made it a daily habit writing something that they are thankful for on the board. Each time the board is full, they erase and start all over with more words of thanks!

I loved the concept, and since I’m a very visual person it clearly displayed the scripture found in 1 Thessalonians 5:16-18: “Rejoice always. Pray without ceasing. Give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you.”

God’s will is that we have an upward perspective. One that is continually in a spirit of thankfulness. It’s extremely hard to be discouraged about things not going the way you planned when you are remembering all the times that God has been faithful, protected you from danger, provided for a need, or sent someone to cross your path and encourage you just when you needed it most.

The act of gratitude begins with perspective, and with you. You have to decide whether to be the grasshopper surrounded by big-eyed giants, or be the giants admiring the grasshoppers. It’s about remembering the little things that give meaning to life.

God gave you a gift of 86,400 seconds today. Can you take one moment and tell the world one thing that YOU are grateful for?

I’ve already started the list below – Go ahead and add to it as things come to mind!