Tag Archives: live like God is real

The Persecution Problem

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“Why have I not experienced more persecution?”

This is a recent question I’ve had when reading the Bible. We are clearly told in John 16:33, “In the world ye shall have tribulation: but be of good cheer; I have overcome the world.” At the same time, persecution is not something Christians should be afraid of: it’s something we should welcome. “Blessed are they which are persecuted for righteousness’ sake: for theirs is the kingdom of heaven” (Matthew 5:10).

Compared to Christians currently living in Muslim or Communist countries, I think you can agree with me we’ve got it pretty easy. In fact, if we took the time to think about the persecution we have experienced, we’d probably realize we were just suffering the consequences of our own wrong decisions.

That leads me to an expansion of my initial question: “Does a lack of persecution in my life mean I am doing something wrong?”

I know God hasn’t commanded us to actively look for opportunities to be persecuted, but then what would the correct response be? If we examined ourselves, would we be able to say yes to the following questions?

  1. Am I any different from the world?
  2. Am I living for Jesus in every situation?
  3. Am I ready to rejoice when I experience persecution for Jesus’ sake?

In many ways, this is a question I am still asking myself: “If I’m really living like God is real, shouldn’t I be experiencing more persecution?”

What are your thoughts?

the mommy dilemma

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On Februray 4th, God blessed us with a beautiful daughter, whom we named Arianna. In the months leading up to her arrival, I did everything I could to get ready– I read books on what to do, talked to friends about their experience, exercised and ate a baby-friendly diet, which is probably why she weighed 8 lb 10 oz at birth– more than my brother when he was born!

Even with all that preparation, I wasn’t quite prepared for all the conflicting opinions. American doctors say I should eat one thing; Chinese medicine says that would be bad for my body. Some say babies should sleep on their tummies; others say they should sleep on their back. One group says babies should be fed on demand; another group says babies should be put on a schedule.

What to do? How do I know if I’m making the right decision for Arianna and for our family? The more I talked to people about what they did, the less certain I felt about making a decision. I began worrying that my decision might have a negative effect upon our daughter.

When family came to visit, I worried that Arianna might get sick from all the germs people were bringing into our house. Just as I was breathing a sigh of relief after they left, Luke caught a cold. Every time he sneezed or coughed, I winced. What if I catch his cold? What if Arianna gets sick?

In the midst of my worries, a verse broke through like a light in the darkness: “Whenever I am afraid, I will trust in You” (Psalm 56:3). Even though I don’t know for certain what’s best, God does and He loves my daughter far more than I ever will.

As a new mommy, living like God is real means remembering that fact and trusting Him to lead us one decision at a time.

 

The Potential of Persistence

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“But Elijah went up to the top of Carmel; and he crouched down on the earth and put his face between his knees. He said to his servant, ‘Go up now, look toward the sea.’ So he went up and looked and said, ‘There is nothing.’ And he said, ‘Go back’ seven times. It came about at the seventh time, that he said, ‘Behold, a cloud as small as a man’s hand is coming up from the sea.’ And he said, ‘Go up, say to Ahab, ‘Prepare your chariot and go down, so that the heavy shower does not stop you.'”

1 Kings 18:42-44

I’ve been chewing on this passage over the last few weeks and I find it amazing to not only see the perseverance of Elijah in praying for rain, but also to observe his faith when the only sign he had was a small cloud way off in the distance. I know it’s so easy for my heart to give up, especially when it comes to crying out to God and asking Him to show His power in a certain area and I don’t see an answer right away.

Recently, I’ve been challenged to take on the heart of Elijah as it pertains to prayer. It’s been an exciting journey, mainly because I’ve been looking for situations to come up in my life where either something seems impossible, or I pray right away and don’t see a result. I have come away amazed and have seen some miraculous displays of God’s power as I merely have been persistent (feel free to let me know if you want to hear some testimonies). Although I believe with all my heart that God is Sovereign and that His plan is still in place even when I don’t see results, I also think that we as Christians miss out on an extra blessing when we fail to be persistent in prayer.

The Christian faith is all about pursuing God with our whole heart, but isn’t it sad to see how often we seek our Savior half-heartedly and just give up after saying a little prayer? Let’s boldly and persistently live for Christ!

 

Moving Day

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Just about a week ago was moving day for Rowan and Jocelyn.

We had been living in a nice studio apartment above a friend’s garage in rural Sandy, Oregon. Then, on December 28th, we received a notice that our lease was expiring and that we would have to move by January 31. It threw us off a bit and made us really nervous. Where would we go? What would we do? Neither of us had ever gone out shopping for a new apartment before.

But shop we did. We looked at lots of places online. We looked at places all over the Portland metro area. We even looked at places in San Diego! Then we had to go look at some of them in person. So we set a date, drove to downtown Portland, and began visiting the places we had seen online. Some of them were really nice. Some of them we knew we didn’t want as soon as we pulled up outside the building.

As we were looking at one place, Jocelyn said, “Hey, what about that building over there?” There was a phone number outside the building, so Jocelyn called it, set up an appointment for a few minutes later, and soon we were exploring the new building we hadn’t seen online. When we walked into the apartment Jocelyn knew it was the one she wanted. The kitchen was just right, the style was kind of vintage, the bedroom was small and cute, and there were nice big closets.

It took us a few days to sign all the paper work, and a few days more and the help of some good friends to move all of our stuff, but we are now living in our new apartment in downtown Portland!

Even though this apartment feels like home, it is not really. We only have a 6-month lease, after which we can move to somewhere else, or the landlord can decide they don’t want us here any more. We love our neighborhood and how we can walk to the grocery store and our favorite coffee shops and restaurants, but let’s face it, Jocelyn and I know that we’re not going to spend the rest of our lives in this neighborhood.

Our time here on Earth is a bit like that as well. I love it here… I love my friends and neighbors, I love the scenery, I love flying to the four corners of the globe and exploring this amazing planet God has given us. Our lease here is short, and soon we will all be moving. It’s OK… it’s part of the plan. Jesus told us this a long time ago when he said in John 14, “Do not let your heart be troubled; believe in God, believe also in Me. In My Father’s house are many dwelling places; if it were not so, I would have told you; for I go to prepare a place for you. If I go and prepare a place for you, I will come again and receive you to Myself, that where I am, there you may be also.”

Jesus is preparing a place for us, a final, complete, and perfect place where we will go to live forever with Him. I can’t wait!

R

embracing community

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When I was still single, I remember hearing about different friends who were devastated when they miscarried their first baby. For some reason, I thought that if they had just kept their pregnancy a secret, they wouldn’t have been so disappointed. And so I made up my mind that when I was pregnant, I would try to keep it a secret until I was pretty sure it was “safe” to tell.

Last March, I miscarried my first child. True to my resolution, aside from Luke, I didn’t tell many people. In fact, it took months for me to tell my own family. I tried to be brave and strong, but the disappointment was devastating– especially since I bore it alone.

When I told a friend about it later that fall, she was shocked. “Why didn’t you tell anyone?” she asked. “When I found out I was pregnant, I told people right away, because I knew I’d need the church’s support if anything were to happen when my husband was deployed.”

I’ve been pondering her words ever since. Why did I think it’d be better to tough things out on my own when God had designed a community of support for me in the church? Is it really better to hold those struggles inside? Is it really Christian to be “strong” by being private about my difficulties?

These last few months, as Luke and I have been adjusting to a lower income, his new schedule for work and school, the changes that will come with a baby, and certain issues in our marriage, I’ve discovered that I really can’t shoulder my problems on my own. Aside from casting all my cares on Christ (1 Peter 5:7), I’m also learning to humble myself and share my struggles with the believers God has placed in my life.

Sometimes, living like God is real means learning to embrace the church community by being vulnerable about our struggles and weaknesses. Don’t tough it out alone.

A Musical Disaster

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Everything was going wrong.

I was part of a recent workshop for the pianists in my church. My assignment was simple. I just had to play a hymn, everyone would sing along, and then discuss the song together. I mean, I played the piano for worship at VOICE for years. I wrote musicals. I would of course come up with something profound for the other pianists to learn from.

But it was absolutely awful.

I sat down at the piano, and I suddenly felt my vision narrowing. I couldn’t think. I didn’t know what my fingers were doing. My rhythm was nonexistent. My introduction didn’t make any sense. I played way too fast.

I was so embarrassed.

I began to analyze my failure. I thought back to my first ever recital when I was seven years old. That was also a flop–I completely forgot my memorized piece, and I burst into tears while on stage. Was I forever doomed to bad nerves? I didn’t think I was nervous, I was confident in my abilities. So what happened?

Simple. I was focused on myself.

I wasn’t focused on learning how to better worship the Lord, I was focused on showing my own skills. I wanted everyone to see how special I was, surprise them with my musical genius. Deep down inside, I was also afraid of ruining my reputation as a pianist in front of all the other pianists in the church.

If I really believed that God was real, then should I be making music for my own glory or for His?

The right answer is pretty obvious, and yet this is a lesson I still struggle with. So often I am more concerned about what others think, forgetting what really matters to God.

Lord, please do not let me use my talents for myself, but to serve you, and to bring all honor to you.

Thanks To God

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Thanksgiving is a time for giving thanks, for telling others and ourselves how thankful we are for things in our lives. Usually it’s a time for looking at the bigger picture and declaring how thankful we are for various “big” things.

“I’m thankful that I got a job.”
“I’m thankful for peaceful evenings.”
“I’m thankful for my family.”

There is no person that we could be thanking for these kinds of things…except God. No human, or even group of humans, could really take responsibility for these things and say, “You have that because of me.” Thankfulness is a quality that requires two people. Without God in the picture, all we have is a kind of happy feeling that says, “Man, I love the fact that I have this!” Without God, Thanksgiving Day is just Warm Fuzzies Day.

I recently read God Is Not Great by Christopher Hitchens, a well-known atheist in America. He talks about places in life where we seem, coincidentally, to have exactly what we need. Many people have claimed that this shows God’s goodness in giving us what we need. But Hitchens claims just the opposite: that it shows there is no God because we get what we need without him.

This perspective would eliminate most of what we talk about at the Thanksgiving holiday. If someone decides to give me a bowl of soup, it makes sense for me to thank them. But if a coin is flipped and without anyone’s good will I am given the soup, where can my gratitude be directed? To the coin? There is no place for thankfulness in that case.

But of course we are thankful for the kinds of things mentioned above. As we celebrate this holiday, realize what a significant statement you are making by simply declaring what you’re thankful for. You are declaring that God is real-– and living like it.

What is Good?

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I’m taking philosophy classes at the University of Oklahoma, and enjoying it a lot. Many issues come up in philosophy that also come up in Christianity, but I think that Christians often don’t think about it. For example:

Why are good things good?

Of course, we believe that the things that are good are the things that God has commanded for us to do. But consider:

  1. Does God command them because they are good, or
  2. Are they good because God commands them?

I think that many Christians would say they believe the second definition, but act as if they believe the first. Think about it: we all walk around with lists of “good things” and “bad things” in our minds, and when we think about any of those things, we simply look at the list and exclaim – “Oops! Skipping Church! Bad thing!” or, “Yay! Praying! Good thing!” Is there anything important missing from those exclamations? Think about it. There is no mention of God.

The problem is that we are now starting with these ideas of “good,” and when we now think about God, we will assume that He will follow these ideas of good that we have. We think this way:

  1. These things are good
  2. God always does good things
  3. Therefore God will always do these things

Our “good things” are at a higher level than God! In fact, since they are telling God what to do, they might as well be god themselves. If God brings something unexpected into our life, like the need to skip church or our normal prayer time, we will almost certainly miss Him because we are focused on “doing good.”

It takes effort to learn, but living like God is real means acting as if good things are good…simply because God commands them. Put God at the top of your thoughts. Only then will we be motivated to seek a relationship with Him – so that we can hear from Him what the good things are for us to do.

Joy in Sorrow

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Tears crept down my face, sobs shook my shoulders. I tried to concentrate on conducting the song, but to no avail. Every note, every chord, brought to mind my grandfather, who was the inspiration for the song; my grandfather, who I would never see again on earth.

I was in the middle of directing our final dress rehearsal for this year’s VOICE musical. In a little over an hour, it would be time to wrap up and get ready for our Chinese New Year dinner, followed by the performance later that night. In every VOICE, the day of the Chinese New Year dinner has always been crazily busy with last minute preparations and practicing. This year, it was compounded by the fact that my grandfather, my roommate for the past ten years, passed away in Taiwan that morning.

Was God real, even in this situation?

Yes, He was.

I saw Him bless the peaceful rehearsal that day. Things went so smoothly, everyone worked together so well to get everything done in the short amount of time we had.

I saw Him as I burst into tears listening to fifty people pour their hearts into rehearsing a song, one that I began writing the day after my birthday, the last day I had seen my grandfather. I saw Him in the fact that for the first time in four years, I had enough time to relax and enjoy my Chinese New Year dinner with my coworkers before the performance. I saw Him work in the actual performance, as everyone’s hard work came to completion. Instead of bursting into tears as I thought I would, I found myself grinning with joy. I knew that God was real. And I knew that He loved me.

Note: The song I mentioned is the one my sister Karen has posted in the previous blog entry.

An Intrusion of Grace

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Last summer, one of the VOICE students returned to Oklahoma City with us. Since Chris is an American citizen, his father wanted him to finish high school in the US. I recommended Christian Heritage Academy, a good private school in town with an exchange program (headed by my friend Audra). It slipped my mind, however, that Chris would need a place to stay or a way to get to school…

…until his parents came to Oklahoma City to help him get settled. That was when Luke and I realized that Chris needed a host family.

Neither of us were ready for parenting– much less teen parenting. We had guarded our first year of marriage carefully, but with our anniversary around the corner, we wondered if this was God’s next step for us.

After talking seriously about it, we told his parents that we’d pray about it. I’ll never forget the look of relief in their eyes as they shared how they had gotten up at 4:30 that morning to pray that we might take Chris into our home.

That was nine months ago. Serving God this year has meant taking Chris to school, cooking for three, cutting his hair, tutoring him in Shakespeare and grammar, picking him up after football practice, helping him get his motorcycle license, and talking through important life issues.

An intrusion to our lives? Yes, but it’s been an intrusion of grace as we’ve been learning to let God use us as a channel of His irrational, extravagant love.

“In this is love, not that we loved God, but that He loved us and sent His Son to be the propitiation for our sins. Beloved, if God so loved us, we also ought to love one another.” (I John 4:10-11)